Saturday, January 10, 2015

2015

10 days in 2015 and I still feel the same. No, actually I feel lonelier and sadder than 2014. Must be all the flying and different timezones. Me spending 12mn (GMT+8) in Munich all alone isn't cool. Oh well. At least i was in Europe. Could be somewhere worst, and smellier.

2014 has been a complete mess. I once said, 'I want a love so deep that the ocean would be jealous'. Wonder if the ocean is jealous now.

Everyone got sick of my problems. This is why I stopped telling. Even I myself got sick of them. This is why I decided to end it. Not easy but I finally did it. Not ready for anything. Not deserving to get anything. That's what I feel now. Confused, heartbroken and filled with guilt. How can something so simple turned out to be so ugly?

You were the one whom I turned to when I've dilemmas. Big or small: what to have for lunch, which photo looks better on Instagram, what outfit to wear (you would always always choose the dress) or what time to sleep even. I wish there was an answer to this endless dilemma.

You gave up on me.
I gave up on myself too.